You're holding a HELD card — the front is a card to hold, the back is a lesson, and this room is yours forever. New here? How this works →
HELD · for the end of a marriage · every card is a room
✦ Sit with Kelly — she’ll hold this card with you in the press →
The people who came with them — the mother-in-law you loved, the cousins, the family table — are real losses too. You're allowed to grieve people who are still alive.
The back of Secondary losses — with the code that opens this room
tap the card to turn it over

REMEMBER · X

Lesson 36 of LII · the REMEMBER course
The idea behind this card — Secondary losses

The people who came with them — the mother-in-law you loved, the cousins, the family table — are real losses too. You're allowed to grieve people who are still alive.

REMEMBER — The marriage, the story, the years — held honestly

…people sat with this card this month
…

The practice

name the person from their side you actually miss. If reaching out is possible, safe, and wanted, one small line is allowed. If it isn't, one line in a notebook marks the seat. Both count as mourning.

Where this idea comes from

  • Ambiguous loss — Boss

More in this deck

TEND · X  ·  GROUND · X  ·  FEEL · X

This room doesn't expire. Come back for whatever is coming up — tonight, the anniversary, years from now.

This card lives in the deck — 52 companions. Buy the physical deck — $35.00 · free US shipping